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Author Topic: What Would Warboss Gulgrim do?  (Read 1858 times)

Offline Shadow Chorus

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What Would Warboss Gulgrim do?
« on: September 24, 2013, 09:29:03 PM »
(With Clutchfiend's blessing I Do hereby begin this thread, an in-character question and answer thread where Warboss Gulgrim answers the questions his Boyz may have. All of this occuring some time before his entrance into the Eye of Terror thread.)

"Gather round ya lousy runtz! Warboss Gulgrim's 'ere!" The Warboss bellowed, storming into the vast main hangar of his Kill Krooza. Orks of all shapes and sizes began pouring in to hear what their Warboss had to say until the room was packed with Orks.

"So, I'z been 'earin dat some o' you boyz is wonderin' 'bout what ta do if ya seez somefin' ya ain't used ta. Like anyfin' dat's weird dem spikey boyz do. Well I'z da Warboss, so what I sez goes. If you'z got a question, you'z bring it ta me! So, what ya got? You dere, you! What you'z wanna know?" Gulgrim says, pointing at the first boy to start jumping up and down trying to get his attention in the middle of the throng.

Offline Archdemon Stu

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Re: What Would Warboss Gulgrim do?
« Reply #1 on: September 28, 2013, 07:05:41 PM »
"Oi, oi, Warboss!" some nob frantically flailed about for Gulgrim's attention.  "Why is it dat we always call eachova' boyz?  Some of dem humies call eachova' 'ladies.'  Why ain't we gots no ladies?!"

Another chimed in.  "Ey, he's right! I gots ta' lootin' dem 'ard boyz' planets... dem ladies wearin' all sorts of red clovin' an' paint on dem lips!"

The prior, "So wait... if'n the ladies be wearin' red... that means humie ladies be fasta... so if we's become ladiez..."

"Den... if we become ladies... we'll be FASTA!"

"Warboss!  How's we become ladiez!?"
« Last Edit: September 28, 2013, 10:00:15 PM by Archdemon Stu »

Offline Shadow Chorus

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Re: What Would Warboss Gulgrim do?
« Reply #2 on: September 28, 2013, 11:44:11 PM »
"Shut it ya git, youz don' know wot you'z talkin' about!" Gulgrim said, stomping to get the group's attention.

"Ya seez dat dem 'Umie 'ladiez' wears lotsa red, yeah? But ya don't see dem goin' fast or doin' no krumpin', do ya? Dat's cause ladiez is weak an' slow, not like Orks. Da red dey wear 'elps 'em keep up wif da 'Umie Boyz, but dey still can't do no Krumpin'. Less dey be dem 'Perial guard ones, but dey don't wear no red an' dey get called Boyz too, so dat don't count. Dem snazzy red-wearing ladiez ain't no fightin' kind. We ain't got none o' dem cuz we'z orks, and we wuz made ta fight n' win!"

The Orks unanimously echoed their approval with their Leader's statement, and when they quieted down, the warboss chuckled.

"So. 'Oo's next?"